For Jay and Betsy Spoerl, being a Big Brother and Big Sister, or a “Big Couple,” as we call them, is more than something they do. It has become part of who they are.

Jay and Betsy have been Bigs with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Wisconsin since 1983. Over the past 42 years, they have been consecutively matched with eight different Littles, making them the longest-serving mentors in our agency’s history.

And their impact didn't end when those matches officially ended.

Jay and Betsy have stayed connected with every one of their former Littles, the oldest of whom is now in his 40s. “They've become like family to us,” Betsy said.

That lasting connection is especially meaningful because Jay and Betsy have walked alongside their Littles through much more than outings and activities. Over the years, they have supported young people and their families through challenges, changes and difficult seasons.

“They truly understand the importance of long-term mentoring relationships,” said BBBSCW Executive Director Dawn Cherek. “They have been there for their Littles time and time again. Even when a Little or family was facing adversity, Jay and Betsy were persistent. They focused on what they could do, rather than what they couldn't.”

Mentoring Happens in the Everyday Moments

For Jay and Betsy, being Bigs has also meant sharing countless ordinary, and meaningful, moments.

Betsy has taught Littles how to bake and played more games of Uno than she can count. Jay enjoys taking Littles hiking, playing catch and having picnics at local parks.

With their current Little Brother, Owyn, they've explored the Food + Farm Exploration Center and are looking forward to walking through the corn maze at Feltz's Dairy Store this fall.

Sometimes the three spend time together. Other times, Jay might take their Little to a movie, or Betsy might teach him a new card game.

It's not necessarily the activity that matters. It's the time together. It's showing up.

It's building a relationship one conversation, one game of Uno, one hike and one shared experience at a time.

A Relationship That Lasts

When one Little ages out of the BBBS program, Jay and Betsy eventually find themselves ready to be matched again. They describe mentoring as both fulfilling and rewarding and especially enjoy introducing a child to new experiences.

They also prefer being matched with younger children. “I feel like we can have the biggest impact that way,” Betsy explained, not because of one particular activity or lesson, but because it gives them more years to build a relationship before their Little turns 18.

Over 42 years, what do Jay and Betsy hope they've taught their Littles? Patience. Honesty. Mutual respect. And caring for others.

Perhaps the best measure of their impact, though, comes from one of their former Littles, now 19:

“Jay and Betsy have been there for me for most of my life. We've done a lot together over the years, and I'm really glad BBBS brought us together.”

Eight Littles. More than four decades of mentoring. And relationships that continue long after a match officially ends.

That's the power of showing up, and the power of a Big Brothers Big Sisters relationship.

No matter their background, experiences, circumstances, or needs, we are committed to ensuring​ every young person has a positive mentor.​